Yesterday I was feeling moody, so beware the mawkish post today; it's the best I can do before I dig into today's work. But it does have a happy ending.
I count four men in my life who are...I don't even know how to say it. Important to my contentment. They are role models, confidants, friends and I am fortunate--I am married to one, was fathered by another, and the other two are especially dear friends. They are not interchangeable as people, but I'm not entirely sure sometimes who fills which role: mind, body, heart, & soul.
Yesterday I desired a quiet hour with any of them. We'd sit together reading, listening to pages turn and the soft tink of ice in the glass, smelling the freshness of new leaves and the tangy dust of the city. We'd break the companionable stillness to offer refreshments and to read passages aloud.
Sadly, everyone was unavailable. Tod was at work, my two friends are half a world away, and Dad is dead. So I sat by myself and thought about them. I sketched and wrote and contemplated under the summer green of a sakura tree.
Did my hour of reflection set something in motion? This morning, I discovered that they all had reached out to me. I woke from a dream of Dad; Tod had wrapped himself tightly around me as we slept. An e-mail from one friend and a phone call from the other closed up all the gaps.
I feel much less alone now. Thank you, gentlemen.
Well I don't have a pee-pee but honey I think this is a side effect of loss.
JUst know that many people love and care about you. It won't really help - but at least you can always ring someone and get pissed with them.
Ditto what The Cook said!!!