Good fuel: coffee and the fear of failure

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When confronted with a mental challenge, my first instinct is to say no and run away. I don't think I'm entirely unique in that respect but it's something I really should stop doing.

"Oh, no, I can't do that. Beyond my ability. Maybe we can acheive a similar result in a different way that I already feel comfortable doing," I think to myself. Or maybe I just panic internally.

On the outside, my clients hear a lot of "I'm not sure, I don't know, and that's not as easy as you might think" as I scribble notes about what they want and how I might acheive it. It can't be a pleasant or confidence-inspiring meeting technique but I always promise that I will do my best.

Which is invariably better than I think it's going to be.

After a meeting with WWJ yesterday, I was in full panic mode. They wanted generally reasonable changes to the functionality of their site, completely within their business model. But they all involved custom coding the PHP. I'm a crap coder. How was I going to do any of this?! Yikes.

But fueled with coffee after dinner, I did most of it before I went to bed at 3. And I was up at 7:30 hacking away at PHP-Nuke again.

I've added access restrictions to the content, created a new block to display the top viewed articles, added teaser text to article listings, separated out content by categories and generally made innumerable little changes. Today I am working on the look and feel of the site. I will get this all done!

6 Comments

Reminds me of the childrens nursery rhyme.. "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can".

Your modesty is adorable but don't underestimate your own abilities and talents - people like me and WWJ don't!! :-)

I congratulate you on taking leaps. For a writer, photographer, and video editor, knowing how to code anything at all is a major achievement! Besides, you're also doing one of my favorite one-two punches: under-promise and over-deliver. Way to go!

I well know that spang of anxiety, and give you massive props for moving past it and making things happen beyond your own expectations.

nice weblog. it's great that people respond to you with words of encouragement. We all need to help each other out. And nice work overcoming your fears of limitations. YOU CAN DO IT!


oh, and listen to RADIOHEAD.

"Radiohead gets in your head."
-Rezwan Ferdaus

nice weblog. it's great that people respond to you with words of encouragement. We all need to help each other out. And nice work overcoming your fears of personal limitations. YOU CAN DO IT!


oh, and listen to RADIOHEAD.

"Radiohead gets in your head."
-Rezwan Ferdaus

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